Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Paranoia

Say for the sake of argument I exist under constant scrutiny -- not hard to believe considering that the poor would be watched the closest as they tend to be the source of any unrest. As such, I worry for myself, as I seem to possess very dangerous qualities:  intelligence, a reverence for life, for freedom and for truth, skepticism, religious conviction, artistic leanings, no criminal record, am not materialistic or avaricious, and am kind and honest.  What saves me are my aversion to conflict and complacency -- I am near impossible to anger, meaning I am not some potential rebel or frustrated young revolutionary.  Then again, perhaps my even temper and emotional maturity are most threatening of all, for they leave few options for those looking to manipulate my behavior.  The best bet short of simply killing me (a stupid idea to kill someone so much as minutely accomplished in the arts and letters) is to manipulate my perception of reality.

My most dangerous attribute is that I can never help but ask the obvious.  The biggest risk I take is maintaining an antagonistic relationship to power.  My best defense and greatest vulnerability is my poverty.